There's something about New England that's just totally crushing. It's not so much the Puritanical mores, rabid love of boring sports (except hockey), or its generally aggressively unfriendly denizens that's got me down -- it's the fucking horrible weather. I've got this condition and I've got it bad. Of course there's a German word for it. Fernweh, literally "an ache for the distance". How great is that?

Even though a vast area of Australia is kind of totally fucked right now, Sydney looks like this!! I wish it were at least warm enough outside to wear that and jump around taking self-portraits. But nah, not in New England. All narrow, unplowed one-way streets and black ice and frozen slush filled sidewalks (if there are sidewalks at all) lined with Shaq-high snow banks around these parts. It's gonna be gross for at least the next two months. It's got me entertaining batshit-crazy thoughts like moving to Texas. Which uh, also has snow, but Jared tells me it was warm enough last week to wear shorts. See, I don't want for all that much. Just to walk around skimpily dressed and not die of hypothermia and to sit outside eating hemp milk ice cream. (Ew how precious does that sound, but for real it is so good).

But nah, unless I spontaneously come across a cash windfall, for now: